Tuesday, February 8, 2011

What do you do when people comment on your kids

I know it is a problem that many mothers face, being told to do this or that with your kids. Its fine when the comments come from a family member, but for them to come from total strangers is a lot more than I can stomach.

Husband and I were returning with the kids from Sibu and as usual, they were playing on the bus. It was a routine play, not quiet, not overly tantrumy, just the usual singing, talking, sometimes whining, as kids are often apt to do when stuck in a small enclosure for a length of time.

In front of us were the only other people in the bus - it was a mini bus -an American man with his chinese girlfriend (I know their nationalities because I saw them filling up the passport at the ferry terminal). The man was 45 (again courtesy of my nosiness and the ferry terminal form)

So the man and his girlfriend spend several minutes of the journey making clear undertones and signs about how the children are disturbing them, and at one point, when Anjali got up to look in front, he blew his top

"Can you please ask them to behave?", he asks. "We have not had a single moment of peace in this bus!"

Now, I am not supporting my children. I know better than anything else that at times they can get quite rowdy, but this was not one of those occasions. Infact, both husband and I felt that they were generally well behaved. So naturally, I lost my temper

"Please get your own private transporation next time if it bothers you", I told him

"So we have to get a private transportation because your kids are not behaving"

"They are children. Play's what they do"

He rolls his eyes. "Children! Thats the next thing they always say"

"When you have your own, you'll know" I said

That shut him and his girlfriend up. I would have, out of sheer pettiness and spite loved to have the girls annoy him further, but they both fell asleep shortly afterwards.

But I have been very annoyed about the whole episode. And after all this time, i keep thinking about all the nasty things I could have said to him


"If your mother has let you play when you were a kid, you wouldnt be such a narrow minded bloke" (I thought of other adjectives to narrow minded but dont want to put them in the blog)


"I am not stopping my children from playing just because a person like you, who obviously has no sense of civility, tells me to"

There. thats out. I feel better.

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